Meet Black and Jewish reporter Ashley Allen (real name Esther Edelsen) who takes a job with America’s most racist network by passing as white...
Meet Black and Jewish reporter Ashley Allen (real name Esther Edelsen) who takes a job with America’s most racist network by passing as white.
CAST IN ORDER OF APPEARANCE:
Ashley Allen – Natalie Wachen
Helen in HR – Ashley Chaney
Elizabeth Ellis – Nan McNamara
Stephen Sly / Elijah Edelman – Joe D. Reitman
Kevin – Brian N. Taylor
Effie Edelman – Andia Winslow
Wahlid Walid – Eddie Goines
Monica Edelman – Janora McDuffie
CREDITS:
Written & Directed by Natasha Lewin
Produced by DaVida Chanel Smith of Creating, Etcetera
Engineered by Tom Fritze at LoLA Studios
Casting Director Medge Ross
Music courtesy of J. Wells
Music courtesy of Bleu
Copyright 2020
A listener note: This episode contains adult content.
INT. OFFICE - Television STATIC over Ashley Allen’s news anchor reel.
ASHLEY ALLEN
... With less than a week to go before the big event tickets have ... Insiders say the digital platform may have been doomed from the ... Fires were sparked by what experts say ... Who was pepper- sprayed for not wearing a ... Reporting to you live from Palmdale ... Live from Reseda... From the San Fernando Valley ... This is Ashley Allen... Ashley Allen ... Ashley Allen ... Back to you, Chad.
TV switches OFF.
ASHLEY ALLEN (CONT'D) What do you think?
HIP HOP music.
KEENAN HR Honestly...
KYNA HR Truthfully...
KEENAN HR You’re not our brand.
KYNA HR
You don’t speak to our people.
KEENAN HR
We want someone “down.”
KYNA HR Someone less “up.”
KEENAN HR No.
KYNA HR No.
KEENAN HR + KYNA HR But thanks for coming in.
A door SLAMS in Ashley’s face.
EXT. STREET
TRAFFIC. Ashley SIGHS. Her iPhone RINGS.
ASHLEY ALLEN (in phone) Hello?
HELEN IN HR (in phone) Afternoon doll. This Ashley Allen?
ASHLEY ALLEN Yes. Who’s this?
HELEN IN HR Well hiya honey. I’m Helen with human resources at Sly News. Seems some fancy folks upstairs wanna set up an interview for you our bigwig executive producer, Elizabeth Ellis. Whatdya think of that?
ASHLEY ALLEN
I think it sounds great! When??
HELEN IN HR Four o’clock.
ASHLEY ALLEN That’s in twenty minutes.
HELEN IN HR Sure is. And Liz hates waiting.
ASHLEY ALLEN Uh what’s the address??
INT. OFFICE
Soft MUZAK. A door OPENS. HEELS. A chair SQUEAKS.
ELIZABETH ELLIS
Pardon my stepping out again, Anna.
ASHLEY ALLEN
No problem. And it’s Ashley.
ELIZABETH ELLIS
Right. So your reel, it’s good. You have a lot of local affiliate experience, which is impressive. But you’ve have no national.
ASHLEY ALLEN
Not yet, but I know I’m ready.
ELIZABETH ELLIS How?
ASHLEY ALLEN
I’ve done over 200 broadcasts. I’ve put in the hours, and the miles. I’ve done dozens of major interviews, I even --
ELIZABETH ELLIS Who?
ASHLEY ALLEN
Who? Uhm, Ansel Answanta, Rola Roger, Bela B, Jonah --
ELIZABETH ELLIS Those are people?
ASHLEY ALLEN Yeah, Ansel’s a Booker Prize auth --
ELIZABETH ELLIS
No. I don’t need an explanation. I’m saying they sound ethnic.
ASHLEY ALLEN Excuse me??
ELIZABETH ELLIS You do know what kind of network Sly is, don’t you, Miss Allen?
ASHLEY ALLEN Yes...?
ELIZABETH ELLIS
So then you know our demographic. You’ve seen our anchors. We don’t do race rhetoric.
ASHLEY ALLEN
I do assignments, Miss Ellis, not rhetoric.
Door KNOCK. Elizabeth SIGHS angrily.
ELIZABETH ELLIS Excuse me. Again.
The door OPENS, SHUTS. Office MELEE.
ELIZABETH ELLIS (CONT'D) (sotto) Will you let me finish the damn interview for Christ’s sake?
STEPHEN SLY It’s over. She’s hired.
ELIZABETH ELLIS But she’s never done network.
STEPHEN SLY
It doesn’t matter, I like her.
ELIZABETH ELLIS Of course you do.
STEPHEN SLY
Get off it Liz, it’s not just her looks. Though, yes, she is very attractive. This one’s different.
ELIZABETH ELLIS Sly abhors different.
STEPHEN SLY
That’s strange, last time I checked I was Sly, and were still my EP.
ELIZABETH ELLIS You’ve gotta stop it with these pretty ones, Stephen. They all end up being a diva like Charlie Cole.
STEPHEN SLY
This girl’s worth the hassle. She’s gonna make us look diverse.
ELIZABETH ELLIS Diverse?? She’s a porcelain doll.
STEPHEN SLY
There’s something about her. A hint of what could be without being it.
ELIZABETH ELLIS What does that mean?
STEPHEN SLY It means hire her.
Elizabeth SIGHS. The door OPENS, SLAMS.
ELIZABETH ELLIS My apologies, Miss Allen --
ASHLEY ALLEN
Look, I know that my past jobs aren’t as glamorous as --
ELIZABETH ELLIS Save the speech. You’re hired.
ASHLEY ALLEN Really???
ELIZABETH ELLIS Welcome aboard.
ASHLEY ALLEN Thank you! I won’t let you down.
INT. HR
Elevator doors DING. HEELS on the ground. ECHO-y.
HELEN IN HR Why, hello there!
ASHLEY ALLEN Hi. I’m here to fill out the new employee paperwork with Helen?
HELEN IN HR
Ashley Allen, I recognize your voice from the phone. Congrats on the job, honey. I’m Helen. The only one down here. Take a seat.
ASHLEY ALLEN
Thanks. Wow, a huge company like Sly only has one HR person?
HELEN IN HR
Oh no, Sly gets sued all the time. HR’s on 5. But I’m the only one they trust with the hires and fires. Been here over thirty years.
ASHLEY ALLEN
And they gave you the whole floor?
HELEN IN HR
You mean the whole basement? Oh, I don’t want to seem like I’m complaining. I mean I got my own bathroom and kitchen. Sure wish they’d give me some cell reception though.
A FILE CABINET opens. PAPERWORK.
HELEN IN HR (CONT'D) Fill this out, and this. Sign this one in triplicate. Date and sign this. And I’ll need two proofs of ID. Drivers license works for one.
ASHLEY ALLEN
I don’t have anything else with me.
HELEN IN HR
Don’t worry, honey, you’re normal. Most gals don’t carry around their birth certificate in their handbag. Just bring it tomorrow.
ASHLEY ALLEN Great, thanks.
HELEN IN HR
And here’s a pen. Oh, and here’s a EEOC self-identification form.
ASHLEY ALLEN What’s that?
HELEN IN HR
Equal Employment Opportunity Commission. Stuff like disability, race, ethnicity. It’s entirely voluntary and I’m the only one who sees it. Nobody upstairs cares anyway. They only like putting up the guise of being an equal opportunity employer, if ya catch my drift.
ASHLEY ALLEN Yeah, I do. Thanks.
A pen SCRATCHES on paper.
EXT. STREET
Street NOISE. CLICKING of iPhone keys. Phone RINGS.
ELIJAH EDELMAN (on phone) Yello?
ASHLEY ALLEN
Hey daddy, I got great news.
ELIJAH EDELMAN
Dish me the good stuff, hon.
ASHLEY ALLEN Is mom home?
ELIJAH EDELMAN
Just missed her. Try her cell?
ASHLEY ALLEN
No. I wanna tell you two together.
ELIJAH EDELMAN
You’re coming tonight, right? Tell us then.
ASHLEY ALLEN
Yeah, great idea. Ok see you later.
ELIJAH EDELMAN You driving down now?
ASHLEY ALLEN
I have a few errands to run first.
ELIJAH EDELMAN Don’t run too fast.
ASHLEY ALLEN
Ha-ha. I won’t dad. Love you, bye.
INT. BAR - MOMENTS LATER
A bell TINKLES. MUSIC in the BG.
KEVIN Why hello. I’ve never seen you here before. Can I buy you a drink?
ASHLEY ALLEN
Sure. Ketel martini straight up, three olives.
KEVIN
The lady knows what she likes.
ASHLEY ALLEN And a shot of Jack.
KEVIN Okay, coming right up. I’m Kevin by the way.
ASHLEY ALLEN Hi Kenan.
KEVIN Kevin.
ASHLEY ALLEN Right.
KEVIN
Barkeep? Ketel martini up, three olives, and shot of Jack for ...
ASHLEY ALLEN Esther.
KEVIN
Esther. What a lovely name.
INT. CAR
The seat belt off alarm DINGS as Kevin and Ashley ORGASM.
KEVIN My God Esther. Damn!
EXT. CAR
Street NOISE. A car door SLAMS. A window ROLLS down.
KEVIN
So when can I see you again?
ASHLEY ALLEN
Never, but thanks for the drinks.
HEELS down the pavement.
KEVIN Thank you.
Car ENGINE starts. The CAR pulls off.
INT. EDELMAN HOME SOFT JAZZ. The door OPENS.
ASHLEY ALLEN Hellllloooo? Where are you guys?
Kitchen COMMOTION, plates, forks.
MONICA EDELMAN (O.S.) There’s that girl now.
FOOTSTEPS from living room.
EFFIE EDELMAN You’re late.
ASHLEY ALLEN
Ooh. I gotta get these heels off.
A shoe falls with a THUD. Effie GASPS.
EFFIE EDELMAN You are sloppy drunk.
ASHLEY ALLEN
I’m not that sloppy. And even I am who cares? I’m celebrating. The other shoe falls with a THUD.
EFFIE EDELMAN
Nice way to treat your boyfriend. He’s been sittin’ here over an hour.
ASHLEY ALLEN Shit! I forgot to call him.
EFFIE EDELMAN Puttin’ the ass in class as always, sis.
ASHLEY ALLEN Shut up, Effie.
FOOTSTEPS to living room.
ELIJAH EDELMAN Finally, Shabbat can start.
ASHLEY ALLEN Sorry daddy. Hi Wahlid...
WAHLID WALID Hello my love.
MONICA EDELMAN
Where have you been, Esther? I was worried sick about you.
ASHLEY ALLEN Oh mom, I was only --
EFFIE EDELMAN Drinking.
ASHLEY ALLEN Celebrating. I got a job today!
WAHLID WALID
I knew you’d kill your interviews.
ELIJAH EDELMAN
They’d be crazy not to hire her.
MONICA EDELMAN
Tell me we’re sitting with the new host of ‘Our People Tonight?’
EFFIE EDELMAN
I bet it’s ‘Rise Up.” It’s ‘Rise Up,’ right??
ASHLEY ALLEN
No. Neither. They both passed.
WAHLID WALID
Then who? I thought you only had two interviews today.
ASHLEY ALLEN Three. Sly News called.
MONICA EDELMAN Sly News??
EFFIE EDELMAN Hello?? We’re Black.
ELIJAH EDELMAN And Jewish.
ASHLEY ALLEN
I know. But I lied and said I was white.